Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
