dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
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