Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
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