Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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