btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Randomize
