You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
The dog destroyed my vibrator and swallowed several pieces. Vet gave us a laxative so now I’m checking lots of dog shit and having no orgasms. Plus the cute vet knows I don’t get enough dick, so that’s just great
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