I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
one two three fourrrrnication!
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
