I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
