Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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