Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
