You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize
