He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
