dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
