She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Sorry my hands just texted you
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
