hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
She's the barista slut.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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