nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
