Whod you bang
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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