Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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