If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
