Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
