I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
