Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
