Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize