I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
