I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Randomize
