Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Randomize
