yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
