You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
