Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Randomize
