well I can't set my house on fire every night
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
