I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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