I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Randomize
