I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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