If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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