Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize