Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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