i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
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