Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
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