I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
