I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
