I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
