someone owes me an orgasm
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Randomize
