your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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