sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize
