he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
