that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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