if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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