Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Randomize
