Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
