wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
My Sexting was not on an AP level
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